Spiderman’s failed Commitment

Anybody who has seen the Spiderman movie(s), will know that Spiderman – as Peter Parker – had failed in his commitments to his Uncle Ben and Aunt May. In the last so many episodes we have seen that our Super Hero – Spiderman had given his perspective of justice and excuses of not providing for the basics expected of a close knit relationship, that these three carry.

May and Ben had been diligent in their duty to Peter Parker, that goes beyond doubt. May has always been magnanimous that a motherly, elderly person is expected to be – no qualms – just that we always expect elders to be magnanimous and forgive our sins – whatever size and damage it may cause. May seems to be an all-knowing person – or a single soul with unconditional love. Has Peter done his duty to May and Ben. NO dot.

Rewind, in our lives we have taken huge favours from our May(s) and Ben(s). Have we truthfully done our best in terms of our commitment or term it reciprocation to their love, affection, deeds for our growth. I personally, have not fulfilled my commitments. I do owe them a lot, compared to what I have gained from them.  Like God(s), they forgave me, and thus, I am blessed with such Life that none would dream of. Despite all odds, I haven’t seen betrayal of Love. I continue to get unconditional Love from all quarters. I AM BLESSED. 

This pause, is to count my blessings.. going on.. interrupting..

Coming back,  fulfilling my commitment to those elderly, caring people who gave me love, education, resources including finances, right guidance at the defining moments of my life. Did I, I didn’t.  My Uncle Ben and Aunt May are live and kicking. They gave me my schooling with no expectation in return. Have I done enough,  NO. Yet, I don’t see them cribbing. They are as magnanimous as our Peter Parker’s, Ben and May, even more.  I had a foster mother, who gave me so much of worldly and wordly knowledge. Besides, her own children as my co-borns. Did I do enough, NO. A mother of my friend, came forward to fund my education, with real love and nothing else. Did I do enough to her, NO. I hurt her by rejecting her unconditional offer and screwing my beginnings. My mother for one, is motherly as she should be, she is. Differences between a wife and a mother, if not sorted out, I am to blame, none else. Commitments are commitments to be fulfilled, no escapades. There are my Sisters, Brothers, Friends and many good-hearted acquaintances, who gave me such comforts that I wouldn’t have deserved anyways. All, unconditional. Yet, I did nothing to satisfy the reciprocal needs of any such relationship. Am I bad, yes I am. Am I the Spiderman of my friendly neighbourhood, Yes, I am. 

What do I do.

In the God’s given time, I can touch them with my honest efforts. May not be able to fulfill in the fullest of the intensity, but to do justice and to bring me peace. Any delays from now, will only reduce the returns and increase my indebtedness. God only can help me in this repayment time.

Love you all, help me fulfill my commitments to you.  Accept my feelings, however erratic they are. Believe in me, as much as you have believed in me, during my teen years. I haven’t changed, maybe I haven’t grown either. Love me for what I am. I am what you made me to be.  Remember, I am not a self-sculpted statue, I am a living body with heart and soul. For a while, I was over-engrossed in one-part of life called Work. Help me come back to Life. Help me now reach a Balance.

Help me fulfill my commitment to my relationship with you.